Playing the game

January 18, 2014 7:40 pm

The start of relationships, no matter what age you are or experience you’ve had, are always tough. The days full of excitement, wondering when you’re going to hear from that special person. I once gave someone my number and waited patiently for them to text me. I wasn’t sat hovering over my phone waiting for the first message, I was still out and living my life – but there was always that flutter of excitement when my phone lit up or I felt it vibrate.

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The first few days went by and I heard nothing from this man. My friends asked me about it and when I explained thatnothing had happened, they instantly tried to reassure me, telling me he was playing a game, that he didn’t want to seem to keen/eager/desperate – pick a word and they probably said it.

In the end I never did hear from this man and truthfully, I was a bit disappointed (it’s always going to hurt when you put yourself out there to strike out in such a big way) but it led me to thinking: the girls had defended his actions without really realising it. Granted it had been for my benefit, but how was I supposed to know the rules when I didn’t even realise I was in the game in the first place? Foolishly I had believed that if I liked someone and wanted to speak to them that it could be that simple. Imagine Romeo and Juliet; how different that story might have been if Romeo had left the Capulet mansion and then refused to text Juliet for the next three days. Hardly the star crossed lovers we’re used to.

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I didn’t exactly think this interest had been the stuff of dreams, but you get my point. Why does it all have to be a minefield? When you like someone, why is it impossible to just tell them? Instead we tiptoe around on the way back to the home plate, thinking we’re getting closer when in actual fact we’re terrified that a wrong step will blow up in our faces and we’ll have to repeat the long walk back to the dug out alone before we start the whole process again.

I urge this of you at the start of the new year (or near enough) – if you like someone, don’t hold back. It shouldn’t be a game, so tell them. If they don’t like you enough to respect your honesty or if they don’t feel the same way, then chances are they aren’t the right person for you. It’s not always going to be the thing of dreams, nor does it need to be as complicated as we seem to have made it.

So take a chance, take a risk, take that leap of faith. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. You might strike out and have to start again, but the innings in life are endless so just go for it!

 

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